The name goes by Tika and you just spent 3 seconds of your life
What's buzzing you?
so this is how sprint feels like.
fast, and no time to think. you must know where you’re heading and at the same time you have to maintain your speed. not constant, but even faster each ticking second.
so this is how 4 months sprint feels like.
tired, worn out, you run as you wash your wet face with the palm of your hand. your palm is wet, too. but you don’t care. it feels like your pair of lungs have failed their function to exchange the gasses and you feel your body only filled with carbon dioxide.
and this is how 4 months sprint with a big mirror in front of you feels like.
you’re a half way there. the only thing that separates you from the finish line is another 4 months of sprinting. that, and suddenly without prior notice, a big mirror appears in front of you.
you’re shocked because the mirror reflects a portrait of an old woman. athletic? hell, no. she doesn’t even look energetic enough to smile. she doesn’t look alive. but hey, she wears that sprint jersey. high and proud.
you’re still shocked, so you’re gasping for air. just to wake up some lazy nerves in your brain. doesn’t work. you’re panicked but then santa comes to help you.
he offers you water. it seems like ordinary water, but when you take a gulp, you just know this is what you actually need. not only refreshing, but it also makes you feel more alive in each gulp you take.
after calming yourself down, you realize that you’ve been going too far. only then you realize that you’re not wearing any jersey and there’s no such thing as finish line. the only thing there beside you and santa was a jogging track.
you’ve been going too far and you’ve been changing too much. more or less to be a person you’re not really comfortable in.
so this is how sprint in life feels like.
and this is how I realize that I’ve been going too far, and I’m on my way back to where I was from. I don’t have to sprint. All I have to do is jog, breath in breath out. wave hello to strangers along the line. And enjoying every second of it.
oh and dearest santa, thank you very much for the drink. I’m sorry I drank it all up. when I look to your face, all I can see is tired eyes. thank you for sprinting with me. but, you’re right. both of us really need a time to take a rest and to enjoy life for a little while.
I wish we can meet again on the road’s end.
and maybe by then, it’s going to be my time to share drinks to you
As it occurred to me, people tend to post their happiness (genuine? dunno. None fugs given anyway) to every social media they have. And since every social media i know is free (hence, the name is social media) people seem to post it everywhere.
It’s actually…a good thing, you know to share happiness to other people. Yakno, just spreadin the luvz y’all. But, it just kinda sucks if you know that you can’t (or won’t, if that matters) have the kind of happiness which almost everybody is posting on everywhere.
In this case is the ramadhan spirit with the loved ones.
As obvious as it may seem, I didn’t celebrate this year’s ramadhan with my big family. It’s not because they’re all spreadin to god knows where, but it’s just that… uh, we rarely see each other anymore?
See, I never really got the chance to do it this year, or any other years before. i just miss hanging around with them, and a day out of 365 others for meeting up isn’t too much to ask, no? And the fact that I hadn’t met them since I was in junior high doesn’t help a lot.
And it’s not like I’m not grateful for what I have, as someone asked me. I just happen to miss them more than I already do this past years.
Stick and stones may break your bones, but memories can hurt as hell.
P.S : It’s true that you should take A LOT of photographs when you’re still on the same page with your dearest ones. You never know what’s going to happen. And when something happens and you have nothing to be remembered, it hurts. Because eventually, you’ll forget how much fun you had back in those days, where your favorite spot to hang out at, and the worst; how they look like.
P.S #02: sorry for the gloomy post. just releasing something that has been buried for quite a long time. The next ones won’t be as sad. Promise
P.S #03: Happy ramadhan for those who celebrate! mohon maaf lahir batin ya :)
I just literally cried while I was typing (-and calculating, too) to get my workloadshit done. this is really pathetic yet it is one astonishing accomplishment I’ve ever made in my life so far.